At a glance
In the complex modern workplace, it is not uncommon for employees to face requests from higher up that conflict with their personal values.
Simon Longstaff AO FCPA, executive director of The Ethics Centre, says humans are driven by values and principles.
“Both are essential, and both do different work. Values typically allow you to distinguish between options that you think you might prefer. Principles shape how you get those things. If you are unaware of either of them, you are potentially at risk,” Longstaff says.
Longstaff believes individuals should clarify their own values and principles through personal reflection, discussions with friends and associates, or thought experiments and tests.
One such test is The Ethics Centre’s ViewFinder tool, a custom profile that helps leaders determine their ethical decision-making style and, where possible, seek employment with organisations with similar values.
“When you work for an organisation, you are bound by duty to apply its values and principles, and if they are not consistent with your own, then it is likely to be a very unhappy relationship,” he says.
Upholding workplace values
The first step for an employee facing a request at odds with their personal beliefs is to determine what is at stake and whether the action is consistent with the organisation’s values.
“We’ve seen throughout recent history that it’s possible for organisations to make all sorts of claims about who they are and what they stand for, and yet require their employees to operate in a way that is deeply inconsistent with those claims,” Longstaff says.
If the directive aligns with company values, an employee might ask why they are working there or why they made that choice, Longstaff adds.
If the request is at odds with organisational values, the employee has three broad choices.
"A workplace with a healthy and safe culture should encourage employees to respectfully explore these points of difference or disagreements, but not all workplaces are equal, and not all managers are able to engage in difficult conversations."
The first is to carry out the task – a course of action that carries its own risks, including, in extreme cases, a phenomenon known as “moral injury”.
“That’s where you engage in conduct that you subsequently come to realise is fundamentally wrong,” Longstaff says. “You judge yourself to be complicit. You feel guilt and find that you are not the person you thought you were.”
Moral injury can cause significant psychological harm. “It can be a terribly devastating moment where the image you have of yourself is shattered by the realisation of what you did,” he says.
The second choice is to refuse the request. Options in this scenario include escalation to a senior staff member, whistleblowing (where provisions exist) or leaving the organisation.
The third is to find a middle path, using agility, creativity and courage to deliver the desired outcome.
“It doesn’t have to destroy your career,” Longstaff says. “If you can come up with a neat solution that allows your manager to achieve the end they want without violating the values or principles of the company or the individual concerned, then it’s not a risk to you. It’s a massive opportunity, because suddenly you look like a person who can navigate complexity and come up with practical solutions.”
How to have difficult conversations at work
Safe conversations about core values
“A workplace with a healthy and safe culture should encourage employees to respectfully explore these points of difference or disagreements, but not all workplaces are equal, and not all managers are able to engage in difficult conversations,” says conflict strategist and mediator Sarah Blake.
If safe, try to talk over the situation with the manager first, advises Blake. Seek clarification about the task and discuss how it aligns – or does not – with organisational values. Try to negotiate an outcome that suits both sides.
If this fails, a third party, such as a senior manager or a representative from human resources or a union, may need to get involved.
“Mediation, either externally or internally, may be a way to help you and your manager find a solution that you can both live with, without the negative costs of ongoing disputes,” Blake says.
A difficult conversation in the workplace need not lead to an outbreak of hostilities.
Blake offers four tips on how to handle the situation productively.
1. Manage emotions
“As with any disagreement, points of difference can quickly escalate to conflict when our emotions start driving the interaction.
“If your manager has requested that you do something, and you’ve identified a misalignment, pause! Leaping in with righteous anger will not help,” Blake says.
2. Approach with curiosity, not defensiveness or judgement
“Explore the discomfort, why the issue matters and what is important to you both. So often, I have seen people discover that their values were similar, but they had both weighted their priorities differently,” Blake says.
3. Focus on outcome
“Consider your options and alternatives before you have a conversation with a manager. This way, instead of creating barriers or more problems for them, you are coming to them with solutions. This increases the chances of negotiating a workable solution together.
“Too often, employees come to their managers with demands or obstacles, which just increases frustration. If you frame your ideas in a way that works for you both, you are more likely to reach agreement,” Blake says.
4. Understand each party's non-negotiables
“These are the points on which you are not prepared to compromise. It’s okay to disagree or differ on values, but you don’t necessarily have the right to demand agreement.
“Rather than getting resentful or angry at this, try to reframe it as an opportunity to find a job that resonates and fulfils you,” Blake says.
“Holding on and trying to force change isn’t always worth the cost. Sometimes, we are better off moving forward rather than looking back.”
